MENTAL MUTHA MEETS SALLY BUNKHAM
MENTAL MUTHA MEETS SALLY BUNKHAM
Are you a mental Mum or a Mum that’s mental?
Oh blimey, I'm not sure. My first instinct was Mum that's mental so let's go with that.
What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Meditate? Talk? Hide?
Initially I hide and feel overwhelmed, then I'll open up and talk about it.....usually with my husband first. He'll usually make me feel better and stronger about it, so I can talk about it to others too.
Do you discuss your mental health with your mum mates?
Yeah I do. Having been pretty open about it with the work I do for Mum's Back I have kinda become a "go to" person to talk about perinatal mental health issues, which I actually feel pretty privileged about. One of the main reasons of having the social aim of raising awareness about mental health in mums was to get the issue out of hiding. If I'd have known I had PND earlier I'd have got better a lot quicker. I'm really keen as few people as possible go through all that. It's rough. So it's nice to start with talking to my mates and the folk I meet at toddler groups about it.
How do you tackle mental health chats with your kid’s?
Well....they're 2.5 and 3.5 so I don't discuss it in huge detail, but I do always try to get them to talk about their feelings and about how things make people feel. My eldest is very good at it. "Mummy you have made me feel very cross!" ha ha.
Who helps you in the dark? (In your pits, your mental rock bottom - who is your hero?)
Well it may well be a cliche, but definitely my husband. He is the one that supported me through my bleak time with PND. I still have no idea how he did it...working full time and having to support me while I was falling apart AND look after a 6 month old and an 18 month old too. He's a flipping legend and I love him.
What helps you in the light? (Meditation? Procrastination? Perspiration? People?)
I do love getting out in the fresh air, I do think it does wonders for the soul. I am also loving working on Mum's Back. It sounds weird but starting the business really helped me recover from my PND. It provided a fantastic focus for me and it's been really empowering turning such a negative thing into something positive.
Is it hard to talk about your mental health? (Doesn't mean on Instagram necessarily, but do you feel the stigma is lifting and do you feel safe to speak your mind, even if it is possibly 'mental'?)
Yes and no. I actually find it easier to talk to strangers about it. It's also easier now I can do it in the name of "work". I've spoken about self harm on live BBC television in front of god knows how many people....but ask me to talk to my own parents about it? That's hard. I can't quite put my finger on why, but it is. I suppose there is still a stigma around it and sometimes that stigma feels heavier than it should.
Where’s your head at?
Yeah my head is doing alright today! Being a mum is massive rollercoaster, isn't it, but today has been quite good. The sun has shone and the kids have actually got on alright and played nicely for once. Wonders never cease!
Soft Play or Rehab?
Rehab. Send me to rehab every time. My husband described the local soft play in Brighton on a Saturday as "like a constant panic attack" and I think he's bang on the money there.
Jacobs Creek or a Jacobs Cracker?
Can't I have both? And some cheese, please.
Nut Job or Nut Allergy?
Nut job sounds more appealing to me.
Self Care or Self Sabotage?
I'm quite a pro at both...usually in the order of the latter followed by the former.
Journal or jog?
Well....I'd rather a jog but I've totally fucked my back. Something to do with 2 births a year and 12 days apart, major tearing and a pelvic floor that's taken a battering. And I know journalling is good but I always fail. It's like that time I tried to keep a diary when I was 14 - total crap at it
Ask for help or happy to hermit?
Ask for help EVERY DAMN TIME
If you'd like to read more conversations with Mental Muthas, click HERE.
Women talking unashamedly about their mental health and parenting innit.