Are you a mental Mum or a Mum that’s mental?

I’m probably a bit of both, depending on the day and level of shit lost!

What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Meditate? Talk? Hide? 

Sometimes I need to sit for a minute, to work out if its me being nuts and over thinking nothing or if I really am overwhelmed. More often than not I don’t see it coming and then all of a sudden there are too many plates, too many lists and I’m up shit creek. I’ve got better at getting out of it by getting up, getting the kids out and walking ‘there and back again’. We just walk till I’ve felt like I’ve left it out there.

Do you discuss your mental health with your mum mates? 

It’s a difficult one. I can barely answer “have you had lunch?” with “well to be honest I’m not worth the inconvenience of dirtying the kitchen and I don’t have it in me to clean it all over again if it’s just for me.” It’s not as simple as “I’m feeling overwhelmed” so just speaking with friends and family help ground me massively, normalcy is necessary for me. My issues around food are dictated entirely by my anxiety so I’m better able at removing my self from the toxicity in my life. I’ve in the past been very give, give, give so now I’m, (as Steph would say), “pulling up the drawbridge” I think that’s come with age, experience and understanding self care is a basic human right - How can I care for tiny humans if I can’t care for myself and if this person or situation is affecting that then I need to remove myself.

How do you tackle mental health chats with your kid’s? 

It’s difficult as my daughter is 3 and son is 6m. I want them to have a love affair with food and in the process of helping them have a healthy relationship with food it’s  helping me. Having them has made me so aware of my own thinking and often it’s just embarrassing. Why haven’t I got my shit together yet? Also I’m conscious that my growing up has a lot to do with the way I still think about food, my skeletons are mine alone, so I’m trying to create an environment where the way they think about it is a healthy one.

Who helps you in the dark? (In your pits, your mental rock bottom - who is your hero?) 

Dan will always know when I’ve had enough. Whether it’s him taking over dinner/night shift or sometimes it’s as little as having a bath in peace. It can feel quite lonely and claustrophobic when your job is 24/7 but acknowledgement that I need a time out and just 10 minutes to regroup can normally do the job.

What helps you in the light? (Meditation? Procrastination? Perspiration? People?) 

I'm completely 100% inspired by my children’s magic. There’s nothing like it to bring you back to the light.

Is it hard to talk about your mental health? (Doesn't mean on Instagram necessarily, but do you feel the stigma is lifting and do you feel safe to speak your mind, even if it is possibly 'mental'?) 

It’s not as hard for me as it used to be to talk about things. I’m happy to answer anything people ask but also I’m happy to just be a part of a platform that reassures me that I’m ‘normal’ and I’m really grateful that there’s a platform out there that can help support people like ‘us’. There was a massive stigma attached to mental health 3 years ago and when I got pregnant I immediately thought you couldn’t have an issue ~and~ be a good mother, I’ve finally realised that actually, I can.

There was a massive stigma attached to mental health 3 years ago and when I got pregnant I immediately thought you couldn’t have an issue ~and~ be a good mother, I’ve finally realised that actually, I can.
— Holly

Where’s your head at? 

Well right in this moment, today, I’m a little on edge as I’ve not had a break for about 4 weeks and we’ve had a week from hell (tumble dryer and boiler busted - so subsequently we’ve been confined to our bedroom with an oil heater in a 7degree house) to top it off we got the car fully stuck in mud earlier when I tried to get out for a big walk - It felt quite metaphorical at the time! (Ha)

So this week I’m planning on sorting a weeks worth of house which always clears my head and LOTS of the great outdoors, sans la voiture! 

Soft Play or Rehab? 

When will soft play obtain a liquor license?

Jacobs Creek or a Jacobs Cracker?

The Creek... and the cracks... and all the brie.

Nut Job or Nut Allergy? 

Nut job - smooth though!   

Self Care or Self Sabotage?

It’s about 60/40 at the minute.

Journal or jog?

I used to journal everyday, but if I could turn the jog to a walk with my kids looking for wood elves then I’m game.

Ask for help or happy to hermit?

I’m happy to hermit but I also know when it’s essential to get help.



If you'd like to read more conversations with Mental Muthas, click HERE.

Women talking unashamedly about their mental health and parenting innit.