MENTAL MUTHA MEETS THE POSITIVE PLANNERS ALI
MENTAL MUTHA MEETS THE POSITIVE PLANNERS ALI
Are you a mental Mum or a Mum that’s mental?
A bit of both I think, I’m a pretty normal looking mental mum who blabs about mental health all the time so people probably make the assumption I’m a bit mentally inclined!
What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Meditate? Talk? Hide?
Depends. On what sort of day, I’m having. I experience things in different ways, sometimes I need space and silence, sometimes I need to feed my soul. Sometimes I need to have a good old rant and sometimes I need to just slip away in to the background and concentrate on getting through the day.
Do you discuss your mental health with your mum mates?
Yes. yes. yes. They all usually find out about our Insta account anyway to be honest and then that’s that. I don’t always go straight in, I usually find it really awkward when they do find out and then once they talk to me and often say ‘me too’ in some way shape or form, then I relax and just accept that The Planner is a tool to help. I’m not just moaning all the time we are trying to equip people with tools to help fight the fog, and then that makes me proud again.
How do you tackle mental health chats with your kid’s?
Hmmmm Mine are pretty small, I try to allow them to cry when they need. They see me cry all the time and I tell them that’s ok too. It’s important to me that we don’t shy away from extreme emotions. We do a lot of colouring and drawing in our house and I find this chills them out and also offers them space to chat about feelings and what’s going on for them. We are big fans of colouring and use it in The Planner so why not do it with our kids to get them in to a creative/meditative space? We also like doing simple breathing exercises like, blowing out the candles... 1,2,3,4,5 and you make your fingers go down when they blow, helps get them to focus and deep breathe!
Who helps you in the dark? (In your pits, your mental rock bottom - who is your hero?)
My mum. She’s been there herself. She knows. We are practically the same person to be honest. So, I can always count on her to listen, or just come over and do the washing up and make me a cup of tea. She knows what I need, she encourages me to get help, she reminds me about my prescriptions and she looks after the kids when I’m desperate. She is sort of like my own personal Mental health PA. I honestly couldn’t have been on this journey without her.
What helps you in the light? (Meditation? Procrastination? Perspiration? People?)
Obviously writing, I find it helps with articulating my brain, and kick starts my creative side if I’m having a cloudy day when I can’t make sense of things or know where to start. I find handwriting and making marks on a page in general really therapeutic, I have always felt more in control with a pen in my hand! Hence where the Positive Planner was born! I find that I need people, but I need the right sort of people and have spent the last few years making that connection. You won’t find me in my house though, I’m the sort of person who is always out and about!
Is it hard to talk about your mental health? (Doesn't mean on Instagram necessarily, but do you feel the stigma is lifting and do you feel safe to speak your mind, even if it is possibly ‘mental'?)
Absolutely the stigma is lifting, compared to when I had my son 4.5 years ago it has changed so much, I tell most people what I do and I’m proud of the Planner so usually that gets me talking about where it stemmed from. Having experienced the loneliness of feeling abnormal and shameful for struggling with my mental health when my second child was born, I am now pretty liberated in terms of being open and honest with others about emotional wellbeing. We all have a Mental health. We all have a limit and we are all responsible for caring for ourselves, I think that message is really starting to break through now! I always take the risk of sounding ‘mental’ as I have found that if that person has been experiencing the same thing, you could actually be the life line they need at that time, and conversations about shared experiences are so powerful.
Where’s your head at?
Honestly, I’m a calm mess. I know my meds are working as I can’t feel the anxiety monster sitting on my chest. But there is something lurking. The great thing is though I have become so used to being so acutely in tune with my head and what I’m feeling that I can probably (hopefully) prevent it from taking shape. After all Self-care is the new Black!
Soft Play or Rehab?
Do you get Soft plays in Rehab?
Jacobs Creek or a Jacobs Cracker?
Jacobs Creek all the way.
Nut Job or Nut Allergy?
100% Nut job
Self Care or Self Sabotage?
Self-sabotage usually and then Self-care when I have come to my senses.
Journal or jog?
Journal, you need to write that shit down.
Ask for help or happy to hermit?
Usually asking for help from the comfort of my own home. Bed is my happy place.
If you'd like to read more conversations with Mental Muthas, click HERE.
Women talking unashamedly about their mental health and parenting innit.